Wow!! The last week I was really thinking about this year. It hit me how close I am to being back at home. Now, I am going to be there in two weeks. It always seemed so far off. Now back from Europe tour and with only a couple weeks to go, I believe I have been really living it out like I would have liked to for the whole year since the beginning; being able to speak German fluently enough to express myself and be understood, having a couple of close friends, being involved regularly in dance, youth group and host family, and being in general, happy. :)
Things have changed quite suddenly, knowing that I am going home soon. I have spoken with more people about things other than where I come from, how long I have until I go home, how long I have been here, weather or not we have fruit in Canada, where I have traveled in Europe and who I am currently living with. I have realized the importance and the pressure that is now on to see other exchange students as much as possible and to have those more deeper conversations with the friends that I have made here.
This year has not been a smooth ride, nor has it been a totally horrible one either. I have made the best of it as I could, while going along each problem. Sure there are tonnes of other things that I could have done to make the situations better and have better outcomes, but with that said, I do believe that tried my best and that's what is most important. :)
Thinking back on a lot of things, I feel like my exchange year was in many ways a failure - I have not had the greatest relationship with my host rotary club or my host families, I have not made friends in school or done many community activities, I did not participate in school to the extent that I tought I would have, and I have not learned perfect German. HOWEVER! I have learned many, many things during this year which I could not have learnt otherwise! :) I have indeed learned the German that I can now speak. It is not perfect, but I am able to express myself and have myself be understood by everyone around me. I have learned to deal with difficult people and rumours. I have learned to have a positive atittude, even if it didnt accure to me right away. I have learned to forgive and tolerate people. I have become more appreciative of my own language and am just head-over-heels happy that I can actually TALK English! :P Any among many many other things, I have learned to appreciate everything I have, in Canada and in Germany. :)
I know that I could have done many a things to make my year a better exchange year, and I would do so, haven given another chance, however, I believe for the deep, life changing lessons, I believe that my exchange has hit the hammer on the nail.
I know that things will be different when I come back home, having experienced all I have..and it is very difficult for me to imagine how it will look like.. But, I believe I am ready to take on the next part of my exchange and life with a confident face and a straight step, knowing that anything can happen, and that I want to and will work through the hard times, even if I am discouraged, struck down, or alone.
Rotary, specifically Armstrong Club and district 5060, has given me this opportunity, and I am thankful beyond words can express. I truly believe in this program and am thankful that there is such a program as this youth exchange program. :) It has really changed my life for the good - even (and for the most part) through the hard times. :) I would never want anyone to go through hard times on their exchange, but as it is, they DO occure. And as much as I would never wish such difficult times upon anyone, I DO wish that they would have an opportunity to grow such as I did. And sometimes, going through hard times is the only way to accomplish that.
So, in closing, I am in Hamburg right now, enjoying the company of my mother's friend from highschool for the last time. I will be back in Mögglingen in about three days. From then it is only a week and a bit that I will be in Germany. As much as I wanted to go home the last couple weeks back, now I am second guessing my thoughts, as my year in Germany has also become a very large part of my life. I can not, right now, imagine how it will be when I go back to Canada and leave Germany... for a very long time, maybe for ever, I don't know. It has, although, been a wonderful adventure, in hindsight, and I would not have done anything else with my life this year, haven given the choice. :) I would pick an exchange year, any time, any place, anyhow. :)
Many thanks to my helpful family, the Armstrong Rotary Club, Rotary District 5060, the Kienzles, and all the helpful and friendly people that I have met on my exchange, before, during, and now after! You all mean so much to me!!! :P Thank you also to my hosting district and Rotary club for enabling me to learn from hard stumbling blocks. I am forever greatful.
See you on the other side.
k
Hebrews 10:36
